Is there a switch?

I guess you could say that today was a hard day of parenting. Frustrating and discouraging. I am beginning to think there is a switch in her brain that turns on and off sweet loving Marissa to a very defiant Marissa. I've tried to change the way I do things but I just can't seem to win for losing. It is such a mystery that there are times, when I fall to the ground in tears, just wish I could figure this all out.

I am one of those people that try to find solutions, look for solving problems that are out of the box. I am an encourager, a cheerleader for my friends that are going through their own trials. But, I can't figure out my daughter. One of my friends today, said "chin up, Amy". That came to me in the middle of the battle tonight.

As much as I am sad right now, I am listening to her as she is in her bed singing, "Silent Night" at the top of her lungs and it brings a smile to my face. I do try to live each day as though it was her last. I always go back in after she calms down and tell her how much I love her and she says she loves me too. And just like that the switch goes back to my sweet loving Marissa.

Gotta love Autism.