Friday, March 18, 2011

Hitting Dilemma

I am beginning to wonder why God has chosen me for this journey of raising Marissa. In the recent weeks Marissa's hitting had subsided. We almost went four weeks with no hitting. I thought that we had been successful in moderating this problem. Now, she turns 6 and it is back with a vengeance. I am tired and I am worn out. I feel like a punching bag. Do you know how it feels to be hit in the face by your own child? It is the worst feeling in the world. I can physically feel my stomach drop, my head throb and my heart cry. I can handle most things, but this is beginning to be impossible. I've tried everything from taking things away to the easy button at Staples, nothing is working.

So as I sit here, I am crying. It has been a long time since I've cried. I went in her room after I escorted her to bed, hoping that physically seeing that I was visibly upset she would understand, she just looked at me and told me to shut the door. Then I noticed her bed, she has put her elephant, cow, Mack and bear in her bed and line them up like her dad and I always do. The funny thing about that is her room was dark and she has a basket full of animals. I am not sure how she accomplished that, but she did.

I pray that God will give me the strength to help her overcome this hitting dilemma. I pray that this will be something I look back on and think "wow, that was a trial". As with everything, this to shall pass. Oh, I hope it passes soon. Because a girl that can get four stuffed animals out of basket of forty and line them up perfectly in her bed, in the dark, can certainly learn not to hit.

No comments:

Post a Comment